Funny Harry Potter One Liners

Are you a fan of Harry Potter and looking for a good laugh? Look no further than these funny Harry Potter one liners! Here are the top 99 quotes:

Why did Barty Crouch Jr. quit drinking? Because it was making him Moody.
Why did Voldemort go to school? To get his Horcruxes.
Why did Dobby the house-elf start wearing shoes? Because he wanted to be a free-sole.
Why did the Gryffindor team go to the dentist? Because they needed a good tooth pick.
Why did Harry Potter cross the road? To get to the other side of the veil.
Why did the Ministry of Magic start using parchment instead of paper? Because they wanted to spell-check everything.
Why did Ron Weasley cross the road? To get to the other side of the chessboard.
What do you call a Hufflepuff with two brain cells? Pregnant.
Why did Hermione Granger get a B in Divination? Because she didn’t see that coming.
Why did the Sorting Hat go on a diet? Because it wanted to be a skinny Sorting Hat.
What do you get when you cross a centaur and a werewolf? A howling horse.
Why did Severus Snape stand in the middle of the road? To get to the other Snape.
What do you call a wizard who’s bad at magic? A Hufflepuff.
Why did Harry Potter refuse to take his potions? He didn’t want to Snape out of it.
Why did Fred and George Weasley go into business together? Because two Wands are better than one.
Why did Lucius Malfoy go to the doctor? He had a case of Harry-itis.
Why did the wizard wear glasses? To see the Quidditch game better.
Why did the house-elf refuse to wear clothes? Because they were Dobby’s.
Why did Harry Potter get a job as a banker? To put his Galleons in order.
Why did the Basilisk go to the dentist? To get his fangs cleaned.
What do you call a Slytherin with a conscience? A unicorn.
Why did the Death Eater go to the dentist? To get his teeth straightened out.
What do you call a wizard who’s good with a sword? A Swish and Flick.
Why did the Muggle go to Hogwarts? To see the wizarding world.
Why did Hermione Granger refuse to go to the Yule Ball with Ron Weasley? She wanted to be her own date.
What do you get when you cross a wizard and a dog? A Howler.
Why did the Ministry of Magic start using owls instead of email? To cut down on spam.
Why did the wizard go to the bank? To get his Vault in order.
Why did the Quidditch team go to the doctor? To get their broomsticks checked.
What do you call a Ravenclaw with a sense of humor? A rare breed.
Why did the wizard wear a cloak? To keep his spells under cover.
Why did the hippogriff cross the road? To get to the other hyde.
Why did the dragon hide its treasure? To keep it safe from Harry Potter.
What do you call a wizard who’s good at baking? A dough wizard.
Why did the Muggle go to the wizarding world? To see the magic.
Why did the wizard go to the library? To check out some spell books.
What do you get when you cross a wizard and a cat? A purrfect spell.
Why did the Ministry of Magic start using quills instead of pens? To keep things traditional.
Why did the Gryffindor team go to the doctor? They needed a magic touch.
What do you call a Slytherin who’s bad at potions? A failure.
Why did the wizard wear a hat? To keep his thoughts under wraps.
Why did the house-elf go on a diet? To be free of his clothes.
What do you get when you cross a wizard and a bird? A spellbinding tweet.
Why did the Ministry of Magic start using broomsticks instead of cars? To cut down on traffic.
Why did the wizard go to the doctor? To get his spells checked.
Why did the Quidditch team go to the dentist? To get their teeth checked for flying.
What do you call a wizard who’s good at swimming? A swim and flick.
Why did the wizard go to the gym? To work on his spells.
Why did the phoenix cross the road? To rise from the ashes on the other side.
Why did the Slytherin team go to the doctor? To get their Slytherin checked.
What do you call a wizard who’s bad at cooking? A burnt-out wand.
Why did the wizard wear gloves? To keep his spells under control.
Why did the house-elf go to the doctor? To get his sock removed.
What do you get when you cross a wizard and a fish? A spellbinding swim.
Why did the Ministry of Magic start using candles instead of light bulbs? To be more magical.
Why did the wizard go to the hairdresser? To get a spellbinding haircut.
Why did the Quidditch team go to the gym? To work on their broomstick skills.
What do you call a Gryffindor who’s bad at spells? A failure.
Why did the wizard wear a cape? To keep his spells flowing.
Why did the house-elf refuse to clean up? Because he was Dobby’s.
What do you get when you cross a wizard and a snake? A hiss-terical spell.
Why did the Ministry of Magic start using candles instead of light bulbs? To be more magical.
Why did the wizard go to the tailor? To get a spellbinding suit.
Why did the Quidditch team go to the chiropractor? To get their broomsticks straightened out.
What do you call a Hufflepuff who’s good at spells? A rare breed.
Why did the wizard wear a cloak? To keep his spells under cover.
Why did the house-elf refuse to wear clothes? Because they were Dobby’s.
What do you get when you cross a wizard and a dog? A Howler.
Why did the Ministry of Magic start using owls instead of email? To cut down on spam.
Why did the wizard go to the bank? To get his Vault in order.
Why did the Quidditch team go to the doctor? To get their broomsticks checked.
What do you call a Ravenclaw with a sense of humor? A rare breed.
Why did the wizard wear a cloak? To keep his spells under cover.
Why did the hippogriff cross the road? To get to the other hyde.
Why did the dragon hide its treasure? To keep it safe from Harry Potter.
What do you call a wizard who’s good at baking? A dough wizard.
Why did the Muggle go to the wizarding world? To see the magic.
Why did the wizard go to the library? To check out some spell books.
What do you get when you cross a wizard and a cat? A purrfect spell.
Why did the Ministry of Magic start using quills instead of pens? To keep things traditional.
Why did the Gryffindor team go to the doctor? They needed a magic touch.
What do you call a Slytherin who’s bad at potions? A failure.
Why did the wizard wear a hat? To keep his thoughts under

Utter 7 OneLiners from Harry Potter that are BestFriendGoals from utter.bewakoof.com