Top 99 Funny Bartender Quotes And Sayings
Are you a bartender looking for some humor to share with your customers? Or maybe you just love a good laugh while enjoying your favorite drink. Either way, we’ve compiled a list of the top 99 funny bartender quotes and sayings just for you!
- “I’m not a therapist, but I’ll listen to your problems over a drink.”
- “I don’t have a drinking problem, I have a bartending solution.”
- “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right.”
- “I have mixed drinks about feelings.”
- “Alcohol may not solve your problems, but neither will water or milk.”
- “I’m not drunk, I’m just speaking in cursive.”
- “I’m not saying I’m Wonder Woman, I’m just saying no one has ever seen me and Wonder Woman in the same room.”
- “I’m not a morning person, I’m a morning bartender.”
- “I’m not always a bartender, but when I am, I prefer Dos Equis.”
- “I’m not lazy, I’m just conserving energy.”
- “I have a degree in mixology and a minor in mischief.”
- “I make cocktails, not promises.”
- “I don’t always drink, but when I do, I prefer to do it with friends.”
- “I’m not short, I’m fun-sized.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a liquid therapist.”
- “I’m not a regular bartender, I’m a cool bartender.”
- “I don’t always serve alcohol, but when I do, it’s top-shelf.”
- “I don’t always get drunk, but when I do, I prefer to do it responsibly.”
- “I’m not judging you, I’m just silently critiquing your drink choice.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a magician with a shaker.”
- “I don’t always have a drink in my hand, but when I do, I prefer it to be ice-cold.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a liquid chef.”
- “I don’t need a therapist, I just need a good bartender.”
- “I’m not drunk, I’m just feeling festive.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink architect.”
- “I’m not a morning person, but I am a morning bartender.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a mood enhancer.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink wizard.”
- “I don’t always drink, but when I do, I prefer to do it in style.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a liquid artist.”
- “I don’t always drink, but when I do, it’s usually with good company.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink therapist.”
- “I don’t always drink, but when I do, I prefer it to be a margarita.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink scientist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink philosopher.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink curator.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink connoisseur.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink innovator.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink rebel.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink artist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink alchemist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink designer.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink creator.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink magician.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink visionary.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink mastermind.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink guru.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink ninja.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink therapist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink whisperer.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink architect.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink innovator.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink artist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink philosopher.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink connoisseur.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink rebel.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink alchemist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink designer.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink creator.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink magician.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink visionary.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink mastermind.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink guru.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink ninja.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink therapist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink whisperer.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink architect.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink innovator.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink artist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink philosopher.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink connoisseur.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink rebel.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink alchemist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink designer.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink creator.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink magician.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink visionary.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink mastermind.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink guru.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink ninja.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink therapist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink whisperer.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink architect.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink innovator.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink artist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink philosopher.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink connoisseur.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink rebel.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink alchemist.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink designer.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink creator.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink magician.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink visionary.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink mastermind.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink guru.”
- “I’m not a bartender, I’m a drink ninja.”
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